Mother and child

At home I met this whole flock of women who had come to meet me at a kind of get together after all I am almost the ninth wonder of the world. How many people you know break both their legs at the same time??? Well they didn’t take my autograph but I almost gave it to them!!! kidding!!!! They all meant well. Most of them friends or acquaintances. Yeah I was asked the question of why I don’t have kids again and again reminding me why I stopped socializing in the first place. In some cases the woman in question had met me just a month back and I had told her. I realized she was playing rude so I told her: “Didn’t I tell you last month”, now I am not her most favorite person.

Some women even came up with stuff that some people don’t like children and so on. So now along with being an antisocial element, I was also a kid hater. I mean who does not like kids. Small kids of all animals and humans are cute – babies, puppies, kittens even piglets!!! But nah I cant convince her of that she needs her masala gossip. So I decided to oblige her by keeping quiet!!!

One aspect stood out as a sore thumb. These women were all obsessed about their kids. I know I don’t have any, which my Ma reminds me does not qualify me to say anything about them.

The mothers clucked around their kids like the kids would disappear without them around and they kept telling my mother: “Oh my son does not like this…… he will only eat this”……. etc and even went around to making it for them. I mean you have come to see me with my broken legs and started a culinary trip for your son!!! Why cant that damn kid of yours eat what is available for a change?? Another exclaimed that it was time for her daughter to eat fruits and my Ma’s fridge was raided for fruits. So much eating !!! I almost forgot my legs.

The kids were pests in their own right. (They had come for the whole day) Every two hours they would start I am hungry and the mothers would get so worried as if the kid was going to die without the snack…….. she would rush to the kitchen and cook for her kid…… who would eat a morsel and then over……… throw the rest or the mother in question ate it up. The kids were either hungry or sleepy or whiny. If you are thinking that these kids are small………. well they are not…………… some of them as old as twelve to thirteen. All of them school going!!!!

One more aspect which distressed me most was the selfish attitude of one mother over the other. Since I was immobile and have restricted movement I was confined to wait in places for long duration of time……… especially with the house being full!!! I noticed one mother filling a bowl of food for her child and when another kid’s mother asked for the same she did not do it in the same way as for her own. Then the other kid’s mother came and filled the bowl herself………… Now you tell me what the hell was that??? They are all kids and all so called hungry kids so when u fill a bowl for your kid you can also do that for another kid in the same way???

Some kind of sick crappy selfish behavior towards kids at my mother’s expense at my mother’s house in front of me!!! Is this the new trend of child rearing??? because when I was a kid I don’t remember my mom doing that for me. I was pampered but this is SICK!!!! One kid likes begun bhaja so the mother piles the kid’s plate with so many begun bhajas that I seriously doubt if he can eat so many…….. even if he can what about the other kids??? Don’t they get to eat that at all just because one kid likes begun bhaja??? what the hell was this???

I used to go to Kolkata for my holidays when I was a kid. We were a joint family then. All of us kids sat to eat together 16-17 of us. If I liked a particular dish…….. I liked it……… thats it!!! If I asked for a second helping both my sisters pounced on me telling me that it would fall short and maybe somebody would not get to eat it at all. So I never asked!!!! I was small then 5 or 6 and my sisters between 13 and 15yrs. If we understood that then whats with these 30-40 year old women???

I was sick to the core and went into serious thinking. What are they teaching our next generation? One mother claimed that to survive one must be Chalu and she was teaching her daughter to be just that and boy was her daughter Chalu!!! She was the Pest of the year…… her mother’s creation. What can I say, I returned depressed and with a heavy heart giving a serious thought whether I wanted children after all?? I know these women from before…….. they were not like this so what happened??? Do all mothers become like that do they all do stuff like this??? Or was it just a one time bad dream??? So many of them……. all the same hard to believe it is a bad dream!!!!

I always felt that I was a non-whiner until I met a whiner and realized that I am just like him!!! I hate whiners and to think that I am just like that is depressing….. very very depressing. So lots of soul searching on the agenda.

Apart from that its me and the cast in the AC in Mumbai!!! I don’t care about punching holes in the ozone layer anymore!!!

BTW whats wrong with Mumbaikars why are they not praying………… it is HOTTTTT and no rains also power cuts!!! Pray people pray………… that’s all you have in hand!!!! remember Indra and Meneka???? and Dhir I am definitely NOT dancing with or without cast!!! and Kavi no praying for raining from heart……. we don’t want floods…….. JUST RAIN!!!

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  1. Reply
    Ranu June 22, 2009

    @ Kavi: Thank god its finally raining !!!

    @Sucharita: It is really sad to see women treat their children as a means of fulfillment of their own dreams…… very sad!!!

    @ Pankaj: Nicely put about competition but this is not about me. I am a boring topic more about how these women are disgusting!!!

    @ Smita: I honestly had a very close brush-up with some obsessed women what i wanted to know was is this the normal trend? I wonder????

  2. Reply
    Smita June 21, 2009

    It finally rained so one thing to cheer you 🙂

    And sorry to know about ur legs, shud I ask what happebed or shud I go back and read ur old posts?? I guess I’ll do the later!!!

    As far as these ladies are concerned just ignore them. I have been married for almost 3 years, no kids till now and am being grilled by frenz, foes & relatives about when!!! All I do is smile & change the topic.

    I have also seen Mom’s being obsessed with their kids, I sometimes think its natural but then I know it isn’t or may be it is all about how an individual thinks.

    So chill n be happy the world around us might not be very good but then there are still loads of good people around 🙂

  3. Reply
    Pankaj kumar June 21, 2009

    First i sincerely hope your freinds who were present there read this blog which i doubt may not be the case.
    There are two ways to look at it.Think of a a rich man interacting with a poor. Financially he is rich and even if he is not posing it the poor will think thats the case.
    But somewhere in his mind the rich man has this feeling that he is rich and standing in front of the poor man and feeling proud about it.
    But let me tell you i never told who is rich and who is poor. He may be rich financially but not overall.He may not necessarily be a happy man.And the poor may be a very happy person inspite of being poor. So the essence of this that everything there in our brain. How we are looking at it. There is always competition going on having a kid or not,then whether i have a good looking kid or not,then whether competition about study,and so on.So best is to ignore.I am sure you wont like sympathies also and you really dont need them. Its just the matter of time nothing else.

    Cheer up

  4. Reply
    Sucharita Sarkar June 20, 2009

    Rain will lift all our spirits…cheer up, such obnoxious woe-men are real irritants, but just forget them…

  5. Reply
    Kavi June 19, 2009

    Everyday, i check with friends ifits started to rain. And twist in bed knowing it is yet to !

    Well, i thhink the dance shows must start soon. The rain Gods need appeasement !

    Perhaps it is time to get those mothers with bad manners to dance ! God bless our future

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