love vs friendship

Yesterday after a hard day at work…… back at home I was relaxing with a bowl of popcorn (I am on a diet – by the way this is microwaved oil free popcorn not the ActII version) and a short film at sony PIX when the movie that was going on grabbed my attention. The movies usually shown in PIX are really good…… worth watching. Firstly because they are small (my attention span in the evenings has reduced drastically of late) and quite meaningful if I must say.

OK coming back to the movie….. donno the name……. was fabulous……. I specially loved the concept!!! The movie dealt with the friendship of a boy and girl who worked together in a drama company that the girl had initiated and ran. The girl was a down-to-earth and ambitious girl who was quite fixed about what she wanted from her life. The boy was a simple, taking-life-as-it-came kind of a person. They were the lead players in the plays and often used to hang around with each other doing things that were fun. They were buddies. They talked about everything and spent a lot of time together discussing things like life etc. They even helped each other in their respective professions and usually spent the evenings together after a hard day at work.

Tragedy came when the boy started having feelings beyond friendship for the girl. He started to distance himself from the girl and they started to have rifts in their friendship. The girl tried approaching the boy in different ways but the boy wouldn’t talk and then one day he confessed to loving her. The friendship started deteriorating. The girl did not love the boy though he was her best friend and did not want to ruin that. The boy saw the friendship as a graduation to the next level of their friendship but the girl did not agree. They tried talking but did not work eventually the girl moved and left the city but she still missed her friend as for the boy he never could contemplate friendship with her.

The movie brought back memories. I totally identified with the female protagonist in the movie. Yeah I have lost my two best friends to love. It was during my college days and we were part of this group which was kind of crazy. The thing that all of us loved was bikes. We were always on one. We used to spend almost every waking hour together……… going home only to eat and sleep. We did that for months and years. We have driven from Pune to Mumbai (no expressway those days) and back in the same day. Lonavala was our regular weekend getaway and so is Sinhagad……. even today when I need a friend the first thing that comes to my mind is Sinhagad.

We were the inseparable trio. I was more headstrong those days. All I wanted was to lash out at people……. beat up boys etc. I still remember how they always took over when I created some trouble. We always stood up for each other and were always there for each other. Those were days of being carefree and footfree. We’d spend hours talking about life and careers and all the so called philosophic stuff. We were so happy together until love intervened and I had to move on!!!!

People say that love is a very nice feeling. I agree !!! but I also know otherwise. I lost my best friends to love!!!! I have never trusted another soul since then. I grew up most dramatically and even my family was surprised at the overnight transformation. My perceptions about relations are very simple and straight forward. When somebody is a friend they cant be anything else there is no graduating to the next level. Friendship to me is sacrosanct. A friend is a friend forever. I have never had such good friends who are boys since then!!! but at times I feel cheated that may be if I had handled things better I still would have had my best friends as my best friends and we would remain the same just like old times.

We are in touch with each other but it is not the same. We talk of things like weather and careers and families but the warmth is missing. The feeling of being buddies is gone. I don’t hate love for taking away my friends from me rather the opposite I value friendship even more.

Has something like this ever happened to you…….. have you ever lost friendship to love????

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  1. Reply
    Ranu January 23, 2009

    Hey smita!!!

    thanx for stopping by!!!

  2. Reply
    Smita January 22, 2009

    I had almost lost a dear friend but luckily the relationship survived though sans the usual comfort level.

    But to some extent I agree with ur funda, if god forbid ur relationship doesn’t work out u even lose out ur best fren…

    Cool blog 🙂

  3. Reply
    varunavi January 22, 2009

    Even i lost my friend for love.I never came to know that he is in love with my sister and he/she didnt tell me nor i could make it out.Now they are married, there marriage has changed our relationship, he is my b-law now and the way we talk has changed now.

  4. Reply
    hitch writer January 22, 2009

    such is life people get lost… once in the rat race and lifes in different cities every one gets lost…

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